Tuesday, May 17, 2005

New Journal link

I am no longer keeping a journal here.

Please visit me at www.livejournal.com/users/cv79/

Saturday, January 22, 2005

A Scientific Study

This ones for the ladies:

A study conducted by UCLA's Department of Psychiatry has revealed
that the kind of male face a woman finds attractive can differ
depending on where she is in her menstrual cycle. For instance, if
she is ovulating she is attracted to men with rugged and masculine
features. However, if she is menstruating, or menopausal, she is
more prone to be attracted to a man with scissors lodged in his
temple and a bat jammed up his ass while he is on fire. Further
studies are expected.

Now that's what I call S.E.X.Y.

Monday, January 17, 2005

The truth about Brad and Jen's breakup

Sunday, January 02, 2005

100 things about me

1. I couldn't make myself have an orgasm for almost an entire year after I discovered masturbation.
2. It's quite possible I may be a sex addict, whatever that means.
3. I own maybe 11 pairs of shoes and only wear two or three regularly.
4. I'm a Pisces.
5. I've said "I love you" in a romantic way to four people.
6. Chicken is my favorite meat.
7. I hate gardening. Mowing is ok.
8. I loath sushi.
9. My favorite movie is Anne of Green Gables.
10. I often fantasize about winning the lottery but I never buy tickets.
11. I can be very moody.
12. My favorite candy is Pop Rocks, which I have not seen in years, so mostly Werther's Originals.
13. I read a lot of trashy best sellers and shy away from serious literature.
14. I have very few friends.
15. A clean house cheers me up.
16. I've had sex in a cemetary.
17. .. and in the parking lot of my church.
18. I skipped 2 straight months of school in 7th grade.
19. I flunked my first year of 7th grade.
20. When I was in highschool, I wanted to be a journalist.
21. I don't like small dogs.
22. The biggest dick I've ever seen was on a foreign exchange student from Romania.
23. Nothing annoys me more than stupid people.
24. I can never remember how to spell "nauseous."
25. I played the flute in junior high.
26. My favorite dessert is Creamy Peanut Butter Pie.
27. I think I pass more gas than the average person.
28. I lost my virginity in a closet. A very very small closet.
29. I inherited a nervous tick. I can control it most of the time but if you ask me to show it to you, I'll do it for a month or more ... so don't ask me to show you lol
30. I take really hot showers.
31. I was raped when I was 19 by a family 'friend' (not a family member).
32. New York accents turn me on to no end.
33. I scared the shit out of a mugger and avoided being mugged in NYC by going berserk on him.
34. I've never taken Ecstasy or Crystal Meth.
35. With rare exceptions, I'm not attracted to a lot of body hair.
36. I can't stand the word "phlegm".
37. My favorite book is To Kill a Mockingbird.
38. My second favorite book was Drew Carey's autobiography "Dirty Jokes and Beer". Go figure.
39. I found my best friend's dad's porn collection when I was a kid. Apparently he liked enormous tits.
40. I hate shopping.
41. I'll always have a place in my heart for Rick.
42. My favorite holiday is Christmas. Second favorite is Halloween.
43. I'm really not very good at keeping secrets.
44. I've slept with a woman but could not go down on her.
45. I'm afraid of the dark - mostly because of my stepfather from childhood. He still haunts my dreams.
46. Because of him and his abuse, I cower even when someone goes to give me a high 5.
47. I'm obsessed with my tits.
48. I shave all areas that need or have potential to be shaven.
49. I hate pancakes.
50. I love waffles.
51. I had my first cigarette at the age of 13.
52. I started smoking regularly by 16. I've quit twice since. The third time will be the charm.
53. I'm a big flirt.
54. My senior year of high school I weighed just under 320 lbs.
55. I've lost a lot of weight since then.
56. I'm ready to be a mother.
57. I am a 1/4 Blackfoot Indian.
58. I hate reality TV.
59. I save ticket stubs from movies, concerts and games that I go to.
60. The first movie I ever saw by myself at a theater was Ladder 49.
61. I constantly crave Long John Silvers and Sonic although there are no locations near me.
62. Doing my taxes confuses me.
63. The only sports car that I like is a Lotus Esprit.
64. I sing gospel music pretty decently.
65. I can literally entertain myself. To the point of laughing so hard that I cry.
66. I can make myself cry and it's believable.
67. I wouldn't quit working if I won the lottery, only going back to work after a long vacation, of course.
68. Seeing a man cry makes me very upset and emotional.
69. I have a deep obsession and belief that Johnny Depp is my soul mate.
70. I don't care for cake.
71. I love cookies.
72. I'm becoming my mother, especially since I have a subscription to Family Circle.
73. The only way that I'll eat brownies is with butter spread on them.
74. I wax my upper lip.
75. I've got a few grey hairs.
76. I love to have my calves touched, rubbed and massaged.
77. I have a thing for a man with calloused hands.
78. I sometimes fantasize about being in an orgy.
79. I hate thongs and G-strings.
80. I've never been constipated.
81. I have a nervous giggle and people compliment me on it.
82. I cry over Hallmark commercials.
83. Jim Brickman's music brings memories of my Me-Ma.
84. The first time I ever cried in public was at her funeral. I've still not allowed myself to fully grieve over her.
85. I usually cry while I am in the bathtub.
86. I've always wanted to be in a romantic comedy.
87. I want to be in love like in the movies.
88. I look up to my mother and hope to even become a 1/4 of the woman she is.
89. I brush my teeth from 3-5 times a day.
90. I floss maybe twice a week.
91. I love the ocean but won't swim in it.
92. I'm deathly afraid of snakes.
93. I don't know one thing about my father besides the fact that he is an alcoholic.
94. Some of the best friends I've ever made are via the internet.
95. I'm afraid that I won't be able to have kids. Not that I know of a problem .. I just fear that possibility.
96. I love the smell of honeysuckle.
97. I fear going to Hell.
98. I wish I could have met my Mom's adoptive father, Walter.
99. I wash all of my clothes on cold mainly to save money on the gas bill.
100. I hope those close to me know how much I really love them.

Friday, December 31, 2004

About This Site

My name is Holly M.A. Schwartz. I am engaged to a lucky bastard named Ben. We live in Columbus, OH. We've been together since September of 2000.

I am a media planner/buyer for an in-house advertising agency. I don't really fit the bill when it comes to the reg insight of a media planner and buyer. I actually do my job - sometimes.

In my deprived life before I moved here I was a swing manager at a McDonalds - for 6 1/2 years (Oh.My.Gaw) I lived and worked in the non-magical land, er, town of Muskogee, OK, for most of my life. Well, besides when I turned 20 and thought of how cool it would be to move to NY, which lasted all of 8 months. So back to Muskogee.. I worked with anyone from bible pushers to drug addicts, probably some prostitutes, who knows? My life was made up of smoking lots of pot and drinking. Somehow, my friend's (multiple, not just one friend) parents always thought I was a good influence. If you've ever had the nightmare of hearing the song "Okie from Muskogee", it's all true - if you're a redneck. That's why I moved.

I got ill my senior year and never graduated and still got my advertising gig that I have dreamt of since I was a kid. Well, ok, I didn't exactly dream of hitting the low level advertising gig but it's a start. Oh yes, and I also attended the Media Buying Academy boot camp.

Let's see. I was raised a southern Baptist, and was told that dancing and pre-marital sex was a sin. So was listening to vinyl records - "if you play them backwards, you can hear Satan" Blah. Not that it stopped me. I was doing the mattress mambo at the young age of 14. I still don't dance a lot in public. Not that I'm afraid of sinning.. just that I can't dance worth shit.

I moved to Columbus, OH after meeting up with a friend from the internet whom I had met 3 years before in a TalkCity chat room called Coffeehse and he had told me that the jobs are a lot better here and talked me into cutting my apron strings a month and a half later. After sleeping in separate rooms, as roomates, for 6 months, we finally gave in to each other as a whole and hence, Ben and I are now engaged.

I think that OSU is Hell on Earth. That is, especially if you are not a football fan - and college football at that. I think Columbus, OH needs to find a new hobby that doesn't include the word "Buckeye". GET OVER IT.

If you find yourself wondering why MooGoo? It's short for my nickname of Mooey Gooey. I loved the nickname so much that it stuck.

The point of this website is to record memories, present happenings and just about any damn thing I want to write about cuz it's mine, ALL MINE! I talk a lot about useless information, basically cuz I am useless. I love General Tso's Chicken, hot wings, oreos, mint chocolate chip icecream, my breasts, and all kinds of music. Oh, and I am always in the mood for sex and miss the whole 'making out' thing.

As for anything else that you might be wondering, hopefully it will all come into play as I get this thing started.

P.S. I'm all kinds of animal crackers